The other day I was looking at a scrapbook that all my friends made for me when I left America (very bad for me) and I couldn't help but notice how dang happy I was.
I mean it wasn't just a happiness cause its my birthday happy... I was just a generally happy person. All the time. And I'm thinking back and I notice that I've always kinda been that way. I think that is why I had so many friends back then. Cause I was so simple. A little bundle of joy. Haha. And lately I have been trying to figure out why I don't have much of a social life anymore, which I know for a fact is why I get all this stress, and why I'm mopey sometimes, and it explains my extreme mood swings too. Well I think that I really can't have one with out the other. My social life was kinda because of who I was. I was fun to be around cause I loved to smile and laugh. Of course I still do, I'm not that bad but I'm not the same. And my joy came from my friends, that I loved with all my heart and I had known since I was born. So I'm thinking that I need to get my joy back, Or find some better friends that make me happier. Haha. That was a joke... but I really need to do something about this because I really can't let this become who I am. I want it to only be a small little tiny time of my life that I was still adjusting to my second move. I was kinda relying on that too, that I would get over it once I found some friends that live here, but half a year has gone by, and I am only getting worse... something needs to be done.
No comments:
Post a Comment